So you’re a man in a traditional relationship, but you have submissive fantasies. Maybe you like to watch BDSM movies, read BDSM blogs or you simply fantasize about what your life would be like if your girlfriend would take complete control and dominate you in the bedroom and beyond. Maybe you’ve even secretly visited a Dominatrix or a Dungeon and fell in love with the lifestyle. But how do you introduce your fantasies to your female partner, and how do you get her to entertain the idea of a Female Led Relationship if she’s not naturally dominant or not already interested in BDSM?

Before you bring up the subject in any way with your girlfriend, keep in mind that her only concept of BDSM relationships may be the hokey, cartoonish Dominatrix in leather and lace that chases around men with her whips and chains, bent on causing pain. If you just walk up to her and ask her to dominate you, she may be turned off for good. So you really have to be prepared to take it slowly and acclimate her to the idea so that she can truly understand the lifestyle and the benefits before being scared by the stereotypes she likely will imagine at first mention.

Bringing up the topic can actually be the trickiest part. Go slowly and take your time here. Go to the adult shop together and look at the Domme section and discuss if she has any interest in domination. Have her read a good, professional blog about Female Led Relationships and ask her what she thinks, if it turns her on, and if so move to videos that depict a Female Led Relationship positively. The key is to find resources that depict Female Led Relationships accurately as a lifestyle option and not just as a fetish.

If she is open to the material that you watch or read or discuss together, you can then ask her if she might be interested in trying some Dominant/submissive play herself. It can be as simple as asking her to make all the decisions and plans for one full day, telling you what to do the entire time. If your girlfriend enjoys this, discuss how you can take it to the next level and increase her level of domination.

For a girlfriend that has never been involved in a Female Led Relationship before, it might also be wise to introduce her to other Dominants through either a support group, a meet­up group, or a Dungeon. This will allow your girlfriend the chance to interact with other Dominants and see what the lifestyle is all about. Sometimes this is all it takes to get her fully on board, and the more she hears about the benefits of the lifestyle, the more she will decide to give it a try.

Also remember to explain to her why you are interested in a Female Led Relationship, in a heartfelt and passionate manner. If she thinks it’s just a passing fad or fetish, she’s not likely to get on board. But if you sit down and truly explain your desires and what it would mean to you if she were Dominant, she will be more receptive and will want to help you live your dreams. But also realize that a Female Led Relationship is not for everyone, and some women are just not interested in Domination. But maybe your girlfriend will find this new lifestyle exciting and you’ll get the Female Led Relationship you’ve always dreamed of.

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